In the Doghouse - Chapter 146
“The weight change is within a normal range, so there’s no need to worry. Your health is perfectly fine.”
After completing the standard examination, the palace physician neatly packed away his magical tools. Courtney’s gaze dimmed slightly. “No issues,” he had said, carrying a dual meaning: she was healthy, but she wasn’t pregnant.
It was still early to be concerned, yet she couldn’t help but feel impatient. The imperial family eagerly awaited an heir, and the Emperor, in particular, seemed keen for the birth of an imperial descendant.
The aging physician hadn’t noticed the subtle restlessness in her expression.
“Then, I’ll take my leave.”
“Thank you.”
Once he left, Isabella, who had stayed nearby during the examination, spoke up.
“Don’t be too disappointed. I’m sure there will be good news soon.”
“Hm?”
Courtney was slightly surprised by her comment, as she hadn’t openly expressed her hopes for pregnancy to anyone. Seeing Courtney’s puzzled look, Isabella offered a soft smile and continued.
“I was the same way early in my marriage. No one said anything, but my heart kept feeling restless.”
“Oh…”
“You’re in perfect health, and you and His Highness get along wonderfully, so there’s no need to worry. Honestly, when the time comes, you might find yourself missing these days.”
Courtney’s previously tense expression softened a little at Isabella’s playful words.
Unlike the unmarried Rebecca, Isabella was a few years older than Courtney and already had two children. While Rebecca felt like a younger friend or sister, Isabella was more like an older sister or mentor. Courtney took this opportunity to ask a question that had been on her mind.
“What was it like being pregnant? I hear it’s different for everyone.”
“Oh, don’t get me started. My cravings would change a dozen times a day, and my emotions were all over the place. Once, I craved a cherry pie like the one my old nanny used to make. I tracked down a chef from that region, but after one bite, I burst into tears because it didn’t taste the same. I cried all night because it felt so heartbreaking at the time.”
Courtney couldn’t help but laugh at her story, unsure if it was entirely true or not. Just then, the door to the room opened.
“Your Highness…?”
Rebecca peeked through the door, her face curious. Courtney quickly covered her mouth with her hand and replied.
“Yes? Is something the matter?”
“Yes, the clothing inventory doesn’t match up. Were you having a conversation about something interesting?”
“Oh, nothing important. Let’s go.”
Courtney stood, and Isabella adjusted the wrinkles in her skirt.
Rebecca tilted her head, feeling a bit left out, as if she had missed out on something fun. She pouted, but as she moved to follow Courtney, Isabella called her name.
“Rebecca?”
“Yes!”
After finishing her tasks, Courtney requested that the amount of food served in the dining hall be reduced by about a quarter per meal. It was still manageable now, but she didn’t want to end up with an unflattering figure.
No one could have known what kind of butterfly effect this seemingly trivial decision would set in motion.
* * *
Frederick left Courtney a letter before departing for the border. It was a thick letter, filled almost entirely with apologies, save for a few greetings at the beginning and end. It read like the confession of a criminal awaiting execution.
He apologized for all sorts of incidents from their childhood, from putting a bug in her swaddling cloth as a baby to tripping her in the temple when she was five and setting her ponytail on fire when she was seven. Petty, silly childhood pranks that, while sometimes serious, were mostly inconsequential and long forgotten by Courtney.
The letter was mostly sincere in tone, with a significant part dedicated to his regrets over gambling and squandering the family’s fortune. The words were so laden with remorse that they almost felt excessive. And towards the end, he added:
[I won’t ask for forgiveness. Just, please, take care of Elise. She’s a kind woman who loved someone like me. I beg of you.]
He implored her over several lines to look after his wife, who would remain in the capital alone. He described her as fearful, lacking in social graces, and undeserving of the life of a widow. Frederick had paid little attention to anyone else in the family, yet he seemed to care deeply for Elise.
Despite their marriage coming about as a result of a mere game of dice, it was clear that Frederick and Elise loved each other. Courtney didn’t fully understand it, but she couldn’t deny it either.
The letter contained no request to look after his own well-being. Instead, it showed his genuine concern that Courtney might ignore his wife, whom he feared would be left helpless. There was no doubting the sincerity of his words unless one went out of their way to view it cynically.
But did this mean Courtney forgave him and chose not to send him away? No. She thought he still needed time to let these sincere reflections settle within him. Instead, the next day, she sent Elise a letter of condolence along with a gift.
Frederick’s letter left her with two thoughts. One was a flicker of hope that her brother, whom she had deemed hopeless, might truly change. The other was a realization that there is no definitive answer to the concept of marriage or love.
In comparison to Frederick and Elise, she and Richard had chosen each other of their own will, a more favorable position from the start. Did that mean they could be a better couple? Perhaps, she mused, their relationship could eventually take on a unique form of love.
